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    Home»Ideas»BMW, I am so breaking up with you
    Ideas

    BMW, I am so breaking up with you

    spicycreatortips_18q76aBy spicycreatortips_18q76aSeptember 2, 2025No Comments6 Mins Read
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    BMW, I am so breaking up with you
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    I wish to be clear from the outset. I’ve by no means been a automotive fanatic. My driving historical past features a hand-me-down Volvo with a gap within the floorboards and a sequence of aggressively sensible automobiles, together with a VW Golf and a Mazda SUV by which I hauled my household round for 12 years. Then I leased a BMW i4 electrical automotive.

    What drew me to the i4? In contrast to different electrical automobiles, BMWs don’t appear like one thing out of the Jetsons; I like that they’re understated automobiles that occur to be electrical. I favored that they’re far much less widespread than different EVs in Northern California. Plus, the i4 is available in one thing like a dozen colours, together with “Brooklyn Grey,” which – I do know I sound ridiculous – delighted me in ways in which Tesla’s handful of choices by no means might. I’d learn on-line that early adopters have been having software program points, however with visions of my modern new BMW dancing in my head, I conveniently filed that data away. These first few drives felt exhilarating, too. The automotive was stunning, the trip was clean, and I felt like we have been going locations.

    Almost two years later, I’m doing one thing I by no means thought I’d do: eagerly awaiting the tip of a lease on a luxurious automotive as a result of its software program is such a catastrophe that it makes my rusted-out Volvo appear like a paragon of reliability.

    A love story gone awry

    Let me rely the methods this relationship has gone mistaken, beginning with probably the most primary operate: moving into my very own automotive. On a number of events, I’ve stood in parking tons, unable to unlock its doorways with my cellphone regardless of the BMW Digital Key being particularly designed for this goal. This sounds trivial till you’re juggling melting groceries whereas wanting such as you’re making an attempt to steal your personal automotive.

    Digital key points have change into so widespread that BMW house owners have at occasions shared elaborate multi-step workarounds that learn like directions for disarming a bomb: “1. Open the BMW app in your cellphone and use it to unlock the door. 2. Check in together with your BMW ID in iDrive. 3. Place your iPhone within the car’s charging tray. 4. Look forward to the digital key to reappear within the Pockets app. 5. Double-click the aspect button, authenticate with Face ID, and—lastly—begin the automotive.”

    The consumer profile system is one other train in futility. I’ve been unable to create visitor profiles with out being demoted to the underside of the consumer hierarchy. What this implies in follow is that if anybody else drives my automotive – even as soon as – the car will seize their cellphone and playlist the second they’re inside Bluetooth vary. BMW has over-engineered their profile system to the purpose the place it requires specific linking steps that ought to actually occur mechanically.

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    The automotive’s CarPlay integration ranges from poor to actively harmful. Software program updates routinely break CarPlay performance, requiring full reboots of its iDrive infotainment system. The reverse digital camera problem is especially maddening; put the automotive in reverse whereas utilizing CarPlay navigation, and whenever you shift again to drive, you’re dumped onto the house display as a substitute of returning to your instructions. 

    The backup digital camera itself is virtually ineffective in low gentle circumstances, and the display regularly turns into scorching scorching to the contact.

    Then there’s the lights problem. Until I keep in mind to manually lock the automotive after strolling away from it, I’ll often discover later that the outside lights are nonetheless ablaze in my driveway. I assumed it is perhaps human error the primary time it occurred. By the third time, I spotted that it’s a “characteristic” the place the i4 enters a “pseudo-sleep mode” that retains lights and different techniques operating indefinitely. A number of house owners report the identical problem: park the automotive, stroll away, return later to search out their car lit up like a beacon and draining the battery. 

    Past the sensation on a near-daily foundation that the automotive has amnesia, there are reputable security considerations. The 2022 i4 was topic to 6 recollects in its first yr, together with one so critical that BMW instructed house owners their automobiles have been hearth dangers when parked and suggested them to “cease driving this car instantly.” Since then, different recollects have included battery management items that may trigger a sudden lack of energy.

    BMW releases software program updates for the i4 roughly each few months, however the course of is fraught with points. Updates routinely break linked providers, inflicting house owners to lose entry to site visitors data, climate information, distant parking capabilities, and even the MyBMW app connectivity. 

    The over-the-air replace system itself is unreliable, with house owners reporting updates that get caught at numerous percentages for days, forcing journeys to sellers for handbook set up. 

    What’s particularly galling is that BMW positions these automobiles as premium merchandise. In the event you’re shopping for relatively than leasing, the i4 begins at over $50,000, with well-equipped fashions pushing $70,000 or extra. In the meantime, house owners of cheaper automobiles, together with Hyundais and Lexus fashions, report bulletproof connectivity and seamless consumer experiences. 

    I’m not saying the corporate rushed these automobiles to market with out adequately testing their digital ecosystem, then determined to deal with their clients as beta testers with out taking their well-being into consideration, however I’m additionally not not saying that.

    I genuinely wished this relationship to work. The i4 is beautiful, drives fantastically, and represents all the things I assumed I wished in an electrical car. However I can’t proceed a relationship the place probably the most primary capabilities – unlocking doorways, connecting my cellphone, getting instructions – require the endurance of a saint. (I don’t have the endurance of a saint.)

    Even my tech-savvy husband, who’s often the primary to recommend consumer error, not too long ago emerged from the automotive after a very irritating software program meltdown and introduced that he would “must meditate for a bit.”

    Automobile possession shouldn’t be a relentless supply of aggravation. I shouldn’t have to take care of a psychological database of workarounds for options that ought to simply work. I shouldn’t dread software program updates as a result of they could break one thing that was (largely) practical.

    So BMW, I’ve had it. You made a beautiful automotive, then sabotaged it with software program so crummy that it’s virtually comical. I assumed we’d drive into the sundown collectively. As a substitute, I’m driving my i4 again to the dealership as my lease is over. I’m shocked to say I can’t wait.

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